Posted by: dutchimport | February 23, 2007

Pick and Choose

You can’t pick your family. You are born into what becomes your family for life. Blood relatives who you have to get along with, because if you don’t it will affect many other family members. It may cause pain, and it might hurt the family members you do love.
Growing up I think it’s not uncommon for kids to think that they have the worst family ever with all the drama or some estranged uncle or the weird aunt. Later in life when you build relationships that you can pick and choose, your friends, you discover that every family has its drama, and nothing and nobody is perfect. You read about families who have similar circumstances as yours, which can give you a feeling that your not alone.
With my family so far away, my friends are my family. I was luckily enough to find the most amazing friends during college, and here in LA. No that I’m older, I also got accept my family for what it is, and love them dearly. I know now that I don’t have it so bad, and I would want to trade any of my family members, even if I could. My sister is mentally handicapped, and I don’t feel sorry for her or myself anymore. For years I struggled with everything that comes with growing up with her, but we get along better now as never before. You can’t pick and choose your family. You deal with them the best you can do. This sometimes leads to though decisions and choices you are confronted with. Sometimes situation can come up that are not healthy for you or others around you, and the only things that you think you can do is distance yourself from it. 15319282656551l.jpgChoose what’s best for you. The good thing about family is that you will always be connected to each other, and sooner or later that connection will be restored. Accept things as they are, no matter how difficult that might seem, and don’t think about what you wish you had. Pick and choose the best people you can to have around in your life, blood related or not.
You can pick and choose what’s best for you.



  1. I choose YOU Pikachu!

  2. […] the New York Times on March 4th, 2007. I wrote this letter after reading an article, and I wrote a post about it not so long ago. I got published in The New York […]

  3. Yes, I agree..You do have to love your family for what they are,not what you wished they were. Everyone In the world owes their parents a big “THANK YOU”,No matter if they dislike them or haven’t ever seen them. Why you ask? For giving you life. Now I have chose not to associate with someone in my family. She is an inlaw and lives right beside me. Even though I cannot distance myself from her I still Have not spoke to her since CHristmas of 2008. Other than in some nasty blog comments she left on my blog. So you can do it if that is what you want.

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